Chapter 2: Worrying Myself Sick

When I was growing up I worried a lot. It didn't matter what it was... I just worried over it. I would worry so much that I would make myself sick. So as a child I had a tremendous amount of stomach aches created by my incessant worrying.

Both of my parents' come from large families. My dad had 11 siblings and my mom has 5 siblings. I think both the Buddist religion and the Japanese culture have this tight knit honor to one another. When I was growing up my parents knew most of all the Japanese Americans in the Northern Utah/Ogden area. If they did not know them then my grandparents did. So if that were the case, then my parents knew them too. It is customary in the Buddist religion to give money which they call "koden" to the family when they have a death. A record is kept of who gave money (koden) and how much, so when that person or someone in their family dies you in turn give that much money to their family. Because of my parents' large families and the tight knit community of Japanese Americans I was exposed to death at a young age. My Aunt Kay's father had passed away (she was married to my dad's brother Shige). I remember sitting in our car at Kano's gas station as we were getting gas thinking about Jiji's (Aunt Kay's dad) death. I started thinking about what happens to you after you die. Then I started thinking about what I was before I was born. Then I wondered what the point of being here was if all that was going to happen to me was that I would die and become no more. Of course by this time I was worrying, so you can guess what these questions caused me to experience... STOMACH ACHES! These questions I wondered and worried about created many a stomach ache through out my childhood.

...... TO BE CONTINUED ......